Real Talk

In 2012,  Phillip & I became first time parents.  (This is a surprise to no one, seeing as how we post about 500 pictures of our son daily.  :) )  There is really nothing that can prepare you to become a parent!

One of the most surprising things about becoming a mom was the instant and unconditional love that I felt for such a tiny little person.  Things that had always grossed me out or annoyed me suddenly didn't bother me in the least.  Crying baby? Sleepless nights?  Projectile poo?  Ok!! Anything for my little Cannon-ball.  Now...is parenting easy?  Not at all!!  But what surprises me still is how much love I have for someone who has done nothing to earn my love at all.

When I started dating Phil, I quickly fell in love with the person he is & the way he adds to my life.  I still get excited when I think of the way God brought us together!  The LORD in His perfect wisdom brought me someone who continually loves me in ways that demonstrate God's love for us.  And that's God's design for marriage--to bring together two separate people who will become one in spirit and honor each other above themselves.  Here's the deal with marriage--if one person continually "takes" and does not love his or her spouse unselfishly, that marriage is not going to be a very happy one.  Why?  Because God designed us to need one another.

But with a child, love just happens.  Think about it--there is nothing Cannon can do for me to "give" to me in any way.  (Hopefully he will change my diapers later in life, but that's another story. :) )  But, I still love him.  Love him through sleepless nights, dirty diapers, fussy moods, and I will continue to love him through good and bad choices, temper tantrums, and the dreaded teenage years.  Why?  He's my child.

This brings me to my "real talk" moment.  This is exactly how our Heavenly Father loves us.  We don't add to Him in any way at all.  He is complete--in complete union & perfect relationship with Jesus & the Holy Spirit.  But, we need Him completely!  While we can give nothing to our Father that He needs, He gives us everything, and the amazing thing about His love is that He loves much uglier parts of us than dirty diapers or fussiness.

He loves us in our sin, our selfishness, our weakness, our brokenness.  And HE gave the most precious part of Him--Jesus Christ--to save and restore a people who are sinful and in need of Him.  And if He loves the ugliest and worst parts of us, then we have His unconditional approval and acceptance through Jesus Christ.

This brings me to my point.  (Yes, finally.  I've never been accused of concise. :) ) Why, as people, do we worry and strive to present ourselves as "perfect" to others??  Think about it.  Most of us are terrified to be real and vulnerable with people, but why?  Ultimately, the approval of others does not define who we are.

Why do we feel the need to present only the best & most "perfect" parts of ourselves to others?  Think about it.  We as people naturally want others to accept & validate us, so we present only the parts of ourselves that are likeable and attractional.  Think about social media.  How many people post pictures of themselves lookin' all nasty and scrub??  I love posting pictures as much as any of my middle school girls, but I somehow never have posted a picture of myself with my early morning, Bilbo-Baggins afro.

There is a natural, normal part of us that wants approval and validation.  It's the part of us that causes us to work for success, to treat other people with kindness and courtesy, to strive to be "better."  But the need to be perceived as perfect or always "having it all together"-whether it be spiritually, physically, financially, or emotionally-- can be enslaving.  Because we are unconditionally loved by a God who sees and loves every part of us, we are free to be vulnerable and real.  

And THAT is Good News!!!